THE JOY OF FRIENDSHIPS

I am starting this article thinking about all the wonderful blessings that I have experienced as a result of good friendships, it hasn’t always been like this, in fact I have memories of conversations with my mentor when I was going through a challenging season with some of my friendships and her encouragement was that I should not give up on my friendships but be wiser in my choices and responses and pray to God for good and godly healthy friendships.

I am sure we all have our fair share of stories both good and bad, when a friendship relationship went wrong through a hurt or betrayal and when it went well through the encouragement and support received during a difficult time. God created us for a relationship, first with himself and with others to help us know the joy of acceptance, love and belonging. In our current age, where the notion of a friend on social media is one you may have never met or interacted with on a one-to-one basis, we might unwittingly begin to view friendship as a badge of honour based on popularity and status without any substance or depth.

A quote on friendship that really resonates with me is “When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand.” — Henri Nouwen. True friendship is about being there for each other through the good and bad times, showing each other the love of God through how we treat each other.

We were created for interaction and association NOT for isolation. God’s desire for you and I is to experience the delight of friendship, I John 15:12-15 states ““My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.” This scripture clearly gives us a definition of what true friendship is, God’s friendship with us, and how we ought to be with our friends.

Every relationship that is worth its weight in gold will go through some challenges and a relationship that is not tested will not be strong. Our friendships offer us the opportunity to learn to be like Jesus. God uses our friendships to build our character and through us, show up in the lives of our friends here on earth. I can’t even begin to recount the many ways my friendships have enriched my life. Friends have stuck with me through thick and thin, like family, helping me navigate difficult seasons of my life, cheering me on, celebrating with me and lifting up my spirit when I so badly needed it.

We are reminded in the Bible that friends:

• Make our lives better and successful in “Ecclesiastes 4:9 – “Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help.”

• Sharpen and strengthen each other in “Proverbs 27:17 – “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.”

• Make us wiser in “Proverbs 13:20 – “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.”

• Provide a shoulder to lean on and help us carry our burdens “Galatians 6:20 – “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way, you will fulfill the law of Christ.”

• Love us and are with us in difficult seasons in “Proverbs 17:17 – “A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”
We are reminded in Proverbs 18:24 that “A man who has friends must himself be friendly…” If you desire good friendships, you must first be a friendly person. Pray to God for good healthy friendships regardless of what your experiences might have been to date. There are adventures waiting for you as you open up yourself to loving others and embracing new friendships that God has for you. Go on; reach out! What are you waiting for?

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